Typhoon Haiyan Relief Operations
Pickles from My Mind, Wanna Be: A MassCom Student

Yolanda Was A Bitch

Once there was a bitch whose name was Yolanda. In a matter of hours, she swept off towns from the face of the earth, left children motherless, mothers childless and crumbled the strength of fathers like the corner stones of homes reduced to rubble.

Yolanda (international name: Haiyan) was a Super Typhoon that made landfall on the Central Visayas region of the Philippines on November 8, 2013 (Friday). The bitch brought havoc and mayhem. Being the strongest of her kind in World History, she took lives. She tore homes apart. She broke the hearts of millions all over the world. I AM ONE OF THE BROKEN-HEARTED.

I am one of the many who wept for my fellowmen. I am one of those who spent hours and hours online, trying to find out everything about the bitch and her victims. I was constantly reading articles, watching videos, sharing, posting, re-blogging…

I was obsessed with Yolanda. I guess that’s how humans sometimes react to heartbreak. You find out all you can about the culprit, wishing there was something you dig up that was good enough as a tool for revenge.

Part 1 – The part where Yolanda broke my heart.

We heard it days beforehand in the news – that there was a “Super Typhoon” coming, estimated to be the most destructive ever in history. And as if we were in a sad, masochistic lottery game, it was the Philippines that won the raffle. The typhoon was said to make landfall in my country.

But I didn’t pay much attention to the news. I admit, I brushed it aside like it was old gossip. I expected this “Super Typhoon” to pass by the country the way other typhoons in the past did. I expected some grumpy weather, some destroyed homes, maybe a few casualties and a few days of post-typhoon news stories involving people that were miles and miles away from where I lived. And then that’s it – back to ordinary, Davaoenyo life. Back to arrogantly living in a corner of the Philippines where typhoons rarely make an impact.

On the day when the typhoon was supposedly to make landfall in the Visayas region, our geographic location didn’t fail me – there was barely any weather disturbance.  I went about my day as usual.

It was when Facebook posts and news updates started cropping up that it started. One by one, piece by piece, my heart broke when images like these jumped out at me:

Yolanda Victims 1

Bodies everywhere (source: Rappler.com).

Yolanda Dead Bodies

Two men try to lift a dead body (Source: Rappler.com)

super typhoon haiyan

A man searches for his belongings among debris (Source: Rappler.com)

Yolanda victims dead body

Bodies lined up in the streets (Source: Rappler.com)

Haiyan

A woman cries over a dead loved one inside a chapel (Source: Getty Images)

Hour by hour, the death toll rose up – one hundred, two hundred, three hundred, four hundred… a thousand, two thousand…

It was then that Yolanda’s destruction struck me like a dead fish slapped across my face. I was stung. I was stunned. But it didn’t end there –  as if the death and destruction that she brought wasn’t enough, more stories came. Stories of survivors acting like animals, ransacking houses and establishments, stealing food to feed their hungry stomachs.

Because believe it or not, even three to five days after the tragedy, there was no concrete trace of our government attempting to search and rescue the missing or attending to the dead and worst – no mass government operations providing food, clothes and shelter for the survivors. As if these survivors haven’t experienced enough horror.

” A sad soul can kill quicker, far quicker than a germ.” – John Steibeck

Imagine having to endure horrific hours of a storm, watching the world around you crumble and watching your whole family taken by the storm surge, knowing in the corners of your brain that you will never see them again when it gets quiet.

Typhoon Haiyan Relief Operations

“We Need Food” – Haiyan Victims plea.

Typhoon Haiyan Looting

Survivors of ST Yolanda ransack a store for survival (Source: Rappler.com)

ST haiyan yolanda relief

Kids waiting by the side of the road, begging for food after the Super Typhoon.

Super typhoon haiyan yolanda death toll food

SOS on a ship washed ashore by the Super Typhoon.

Super Typhoon Haiyan

A man brandishing a gun outside his store in an attempt to protect his goods from looters.

Soon, the grief I felt was contaminated with anger. Where was the government? Where were the politicians who promised to “take care” of their people? Probably still fast asleep in their warm, comfy beds while in some parts of their country, people are becoming rash, willing to hurt others just for a bottle of water and a piece of soda crackers.

If the government didn’t act fast enough, these survivors will be reduced to nothing short of savage dogs. They’ve lost their families. They’ve lost their homes. They’ve lost enough. They can’t lose their humanity, too.

Amidst all these, amidst all the stories of loss, destruction, chaos, people pointing fingers, international media jumping in, local media men making a fool of themselves and “1 Like 1 Prayer” Facebook posts in my newsfeed, I was sure of one thing and one thing only: Yolanda was a bitch. And this bitch had to go down.

Part 2 – The part where the bitch goes down

In an attempt to fight back, I contacted my friends whom I met in humanitarian organizations that I’ve joined before, offering help. Some of them replied. Those events that I couldn’t join, I shared in my wall, hoping the “promotion” helped. Even our class was given a chance by our Class Instructor (Derf Maiz) to help re-pack relief goods, a chance that we gladly took.

Super Typhoon Haiyan Relief Operations

Davao City Send Relief Goods to Typhoon Victims

Haiyan Yolanda Relief Davao

In the back of my mind, I knew it was the only way Yolanda was to be defeated. To be strong was the only way to show her she didn’t win. The thing about bitches like Yolanda is they take all you have and crush it to smithereens, then leave you for dead. But when you show them that their spirit-crushing wasn’t enough to defeat you – that’s when you come out stronger.

The thing about Filipinos (and we’ve known this for gazillions of years) is that we are a resilient race. How many times have we experienced tragedies and came out of them with bright smiles on our faces? I’ll tell you how many times: More than the fingers typing on my laptop keyboard. Multiply that by ten. And multiply a thousand more. Amidst all the tragedy, even international media men couldn’t help but admire how strong the Filipino people are:

When everything else is taken away, broken and battered, soaked raw, stripped bare, you see things. You see people as they really are. This week in Tacloban, Samar and Cebu, amidst the hunger and thirst, the chaos and confusion, we’ve seen the best in the Filipino people. Their strength, their courage, I can’t get it out of my mind. Imagine the strength it takes for a mother to search alone for her missing kids, the strength to sleep; on the street near the body of your child.

We’ve seen people with every reason to despair, every right to be angry, instead find ways to laugh, and to love, to stand up, to move forward.

A storm breaks wood and bone, brings hurt and heartbreak. In the end, the wind, the water, the horror it brings is not the end of the story.

With aid and assistance, compassion and care, this place, these people…they will make it through. They already survived the worst. They’re bowed, perhaps tired and traumatized, but they are not broken.

Mabuhay Philippines! Maraming salamat for all you’ve shown us. Maraming salamat for showing us all how to live.”

– Anderson Cooper

And indeed, this is how we bring Yolanda down. By helping eachother. By staying strong.

super typhoon haiyan yolanda relief us aid

Relief Goods from US Aid

Haiyan Empire State Building Relief

New York shows support for Haiyan’s victims by lighting up the Empire State Building in the Philippine Flag’s colors.

Haiyan Relief Operations Japan

6-year-old Japanese kid donates his childhood savings to Typhoon Haiyan’s victims. (Source: GMA News)

typhoon haiyan lemonade stand

Two kids from California put up a lemonade stand for Typhoon Yolanda’s victims. (Source: GMA News).

I wasn’t directly affected by the Super Typhoon. I don’t really know how it feels to be uprooted from my home by a merciless natural calamity or how horrible it must feel to check the faces of each dead body you see in the street in search for a missing loved one. I don’t really know. And hopefully, I never will. But watching from the outside in, I know the pain cannot be described or put into words.

But when you see people from all over your country and all over the world make an effort to lift up those who were beaten down, you can’t help but feel hopeful. Happy, even.

Yolanda may be a bitch. But her bitchiness brought the whole world together. In the face of adversity, humanity may show its ugliness and its flaws but on one side, it never fails to amaze us.

Yolanda may be a bitch but the bitch showed us how to be a man for others.

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Pickles from My Mind

Your Three Words

Image

Your three words melt through me.

Seeping through the cracks of the walls I built.

Your three words don’t touch me.

Except that it sweeps me off my feet.

Your three words mean nothing to me.

Words make no sense when all senses throb in glee.

Your three words, they chase me.

Once in the morning and thrice in my sleep.

Your three words, I’ll say it back, you’ll see.

Say it back to you in 1, 2, 3…

– by Nini Realista Garado

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Pickles from My Mind

To My Future Boyfriend Whom I Know Is Totally Awesome

Love letters to future boyfriend - Rachel McAdams - The NotebookNow I know gazillions of people have already done this – I mean, writing a letter to their future boyfriends/ girlfriends or even themselves. And I’m jumping on the bandwagon because… well, I feel that my future beaux, whoever he may turn out to be, should know the following things. So here it goes:

To My Future Boyfriend Whom I Know Is Totally Awesome,

Hi! You may think I’m crazy for doing this, writing a letter even before we’ve met, or perhaps I already have, I just don’t know it’s you yet. I just wanted to say thanks for thinking that my craziness is adorable. I promise to act normal and sane – well, MOST of the time, anyway. Haha. 😀

By the way, I don’t know if you know yet but I think you’re brave. People – guys mostly – have never gone this far into my life before. And if you’re my boyfriend, well then you must have climbed that REALLY BIG wall I’ve built for myself.

You may be wondering why you had to climb that wall in the first place. Well, to tell you the truth, I didn’t build it on purpose. Lots of things happened to me since I was young and the bricks just kept falling into place over the years, one on top of the other, until it became a massive wall.

It was supposed to protect me from harm. I didn’t realize it would be so hard to break through it afterwards. And even I, myself, could not do it.

Over the years, I did not welcome even the slightest potential of love into my life. I refused it. I turned away from it. I cringed at the thought of it. Simply because I didn’t believe it. I didn’t believe love could ever happen to me. And so if something like it showed up in my life, I considered it a fake. I always expect it to end, sooner or later. And so I thought: what’s the point of taking a chance, right? So I never did take a chance.

Do you know that song “The Only Exception” by Paramore (you probably know that they’re my favorite band) ? Well, the first time I heard it on the radio, it brought me to tears. I guess it’s because the lyrics spoke so much to me. Or should I say, about me?  

Don’t get me wrong, I can love whole-heartedly. I love my family and friends very much. But even the closest friends I have, well, I shut them out of my life sometimes. I can’t even say they know me that well because I keep this happy and bubbly facade when I’m with them. They tell me their secrets and I keep them to a safe and deep place. But I keep my own secrets deeper.

Sometimes when I’m alone, I wonder why my friends like me. Do you wonder like I wonder, too? I don’t know. Anywaaaay. What I’m trying to say is, when it comes to relationships, I’m chicken shit.

But you’re here. Closer than anyone has ever been. So that means you must be very brave. Which makes me very brave. Brave enough to take a chance.  🙂

And because of that, I’m telling you the following things to help you understand. To help you stick around. To help you stay in my life even if I’m pushing you away.

These might be too much for you to handle, so take a deep breath. 😉

1.  I might say hurtful things, but know that I don’t mean them.

Sometimes I do this to get my point across. But I really do not mean it. Whenever I do this, I would very likely feel guilty and hurt (for hurting you) afterwards.

2. I might ignore you sometimes.

But it doesn’t mean you don’t mean anything to me.

Mostly, it’s because I need Letters to Boyfriendmy alone time. You know how you must keep a horse on a long leash? Well, that’s me. I’m a horse. Please let me run every now and then and don’t keep me tied in a tight rope.  Rest assured, I will do the same for you. 🙂

3. Please don’t lie to me.

I hate liars because being lied to makes me feel insulted – like I’m stupid or something.  If you did something bad, just tell me. Please don’t add insult to the injury. Chances are, I’d still love you. 😉

4. Please be patient with me.

I really am not a Princess sort of girl who’s always poised, prim and proper. I try to act like an elegant lady, but it’s hard when my personality tells me to do crazy stuff like dance (most likely, the “Nini Dance”. Haha) in the middle of the street out of  nowhere or say the damnest things because I can. Please tolerate my silliness. Thank you. :-*

5. Please try to love my family and friends.

Because I love them so much.

6.  Please let me hang out with you and your guy friends.

I’m not saying you have to take me to every game or boys night out or whatever you guys do. I just want to get to know the people that make you happy. So that I would know how to make you happy.

7. It’s easy to make me happy.

I don’t really mind if you take me to the most expensive restaurant or simply bring me ice cream. I wasn’t raised in a luxurious home with a lavish lifestyle. I was raised to appreciate even the littlest things. So if you surprise me with peanuts or kwek-kwek or anything, that would surely bring a smile on my face. It would feel nice to receive the occasional bouquet of flowers, though. *Wink *Wink.

8. Forgive me if I have guy crushes.Adam Levine and Girlfriend - Letters to Future Boyfriend

Most likely, these are celebrity guy crushes. So you don’t have to worry about that. You’re still the sexiest thing on Earth. And Adam Levine probably doesn’t know I exist. 😉

9. I love intelligent conversations.

I’m not saying we have to talk about the Periodic Table, Rene Descartes or Global Warming. That’s what classrooms are for, right? Lol.  😀

I’m just saying, I hope that despite my silliness, we can also talk about stuff that make sense. Like your dreams and my dreams. Or why people act the way they do. And I hope you don’t get intimidated if I quote things and theories I’ve read in books and magazines. And I hope you can share some things you know, too. 🙂

Lastly, I reveal the ugliest part of me:

10. I always try to say goodbye.

I’m sorry, I can’t help it. But because of what happened in the past, there’s an ugly voice inside that keeps on telling me to “dump you before you dump me.” Please, please don’t believe me all the time. It’s the ugly voice talking to you, not me.

With these revelations, I hope you got to understand me more. Most men would probably run for the hills if they found out these things about a girl.

But I hope you’re not most menI hope you’ll still stick around after this. I hope you understand that it wasn’t very easy for me to let you into my life in the first place and entrust you with my heart.

But I hope that if you do go away, you will remember that I was willing to jump with you. And that’s something I never have done. So that must mean one thing: You mean a lot more to me than you will ever know.

P.S.

This is all getting kind of dramatic, so on a parting note, I just wanna say, while I was writing this line, I did something unforgivable: I farted. HAHAHAHA :-p

Oh. And by the way, you are awesome😉

                                                       Love,

Nini, Your Future Girlfriend.

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drunk woman - psychology
Pickles from My Mind

The Psychology of Drunkenness

The Psychology of Drunkenness - How I Met Your mother HIMYM

Let’s talk about drunk people, alcohol and… well, anything to do with getting wasted.

It’s easy to spot drunk people. Look around you on any Friday night and you’re sure to find one just swaying (or crawling) their way home and singing “Why, why, why Delilah“.

Usually though, drunkenness spreads like a virus among the human race on special days like Christmas, New Year, Halloween and on occasions like birthdays, graduation parties – hell, even Holy Week!

But over the years, we, the slightly more intelligent species among the creatures that belong in the Class Mammalia, (Yes, I said “slightly”. Haha.) have invented more reasons to get wasted even on perfectly ordinary days.

Let me list down 10 of the gazillion reasons people use to get drunk:

1. Just got dumped by girlfriend/ boyfriend.

2. Just lost job.

3. Just got paid.throwing up on toilet - drunk

4. It’s the first day of class.

5. It’s the last day of class.

6. I just got my credit card bill.

7. It’s raining outside.

8. My annoying neighbor won’t shut up.

9. I’m bored.

10. I don’t really have an excuse, I just wanna get drunk.

Drinking can be fun, especially if you have good friends with you and the conversation, the laughter and the jokes just keep rolling. Not so sure about the morning after a drunken night though, but I hear a lot of people today exist because of it. LOL.

Whether my mom knows this or not (Though I really think she already does. If she doesn’t, I know she won’t freak out if she finds out), but I DO drink.

I started drinking when I was 18. Pretty late, considering most kids in the Philippines could easily buy a bottle of Red Horse from the store and chug it down like it was breastmilk , as the laws of under-age drinking and smoking in our country are pretty flimsy.

Anyway, so I have been drinking for quite some time now.   There was a point in my life when I was hitting the bars with my friends 2-3 times a week. (Tiny voice says: Please don’t judge me 😀 )

And though I’m way past my “sleep-all-day, party-all-night” phase, I have learned quite a few things. My experience with drunkenness is not vast, but from what I have observed over the years, there are different kinds of drunk people and I have carefully categorized them for the sake of this blogpost.

As to whether or not the following info could be useful to anyone, I have no idea.

1. The Mad Chatter

Mad Chatters lose their communication filters when they get drunk. Ask them anything and they’ll tell you what’s on their mind with no hesitation. They can even tell you their deepest, darkest secrets, including their deep-seated feelings, which they would never reveal if they were sober.

2. The Hulk

The Hulk, we all know, is a famous Marvel character who likes smashing things and has a serious anger management issue. Sober, Hulks are probably harmless and reasonable people. Drunk, Hulks could be very dangerous. They are easily angered and are often the ringleaders of bar fights.

3. The Englishman

The Englishman are those people who turn out to be fluent English-speakers when they’re drunk. Their grammar and pronunciation become flawless. Their words are nothing short of poetic and they seem to develop an accent when they’re intoxicated with alcohol.

4. The Laugh Slutdrunk guy laughing laugh slut

The Laugh Slut is a term I got from an episode of How I Met Your Mother. These are the kind of people who would laugh at just about anything or anyone. They will laugh at your lamest jokes, the smallest change of expression in your face and even in perfectly mundane things like a chair, a strand of hair or a plate of potato chips.

5. The Hornet

You might know The Hornet as a kind of insect. But I’m talking about a different Hornet. These are people who can’t keep their sexual urges to themselves. When single Hornets find someone attractive, they would probably hook up with him/her regardless of physical appearance or emotional attachment. Hornets who are taken, however, simply find an excuse to go somewhere private with their boyfriends/ girlfriends.

6. The Peacemaker

The Peacemaker are those drunk people who are at peace with the world. When the alcohol kicks in, they find tranquility in their lives and they just go with the flow. They barely talk, are easily agreeable to anything and usually sit quietly in one corner until they fall asleep.

7. The Emodrunk girl crying

The Emo are those drunk people who cry out of nowhere, with no particular reason under the influence of alcohol. Sometimes, there’s a logic to their crying but most of the time you will be puzzled how random party songs suddenly make them burst into tears.

Drunkenness or Alcohol intoxication occurs when a high level of ethanol (alcohol) enters a human being’s blood stream. It is a world-renowned un-inhibitor.

Vocabulary time:

  • Un-inhibitor – came from the root word inhibit, which means
1. To restrain, hinder, arrest, or check an action, impulse, etc.
2. To prohibit or forbid.
3. To consciously or unconsciously suppress or restrain psychologically or sociologically unacceptable behavior. (Dictionary.com)
And the un in un-inhibitor is a prefix which means to “undo” (Ok. I just made that up. Haha.)
Nevertheless, the overall meaning of un-inhibitor is to FREE all restraints. Pull out all the stops between proper brain usage and idiocy.

So do not be surprised my friend, why after 2 shots of Tequila, you find yourself standing on top of the bar counter screaming: “I LOVE YOU, (Insert name here)! GOD, I LOVE YOU. WHY DON’T YOU LOVE ME BACK?!”

Best case scenario: You will get kicked out of the bar. Worst case scenario: Your best friend recorded a video of you and uploaded it on Youtube.

So before you get drunk, kids, always remember the following:

1. Only drink with people whom you can trust.

2. If you’re bringing a car, always have a designated driver (someone sober who can drive you home).

3. Do not “drink and dial”. That means do not call your ex after getting drunk.

4. And lastly, answer this poll question:

Let me close this blogpost by saying that drinking is fun when you know you’ve handled drunkenness superbly. That means, while drunk, you didn’t get hurt, didn’t hurt anyone, didn’t get thrown into jail or did something that you will regret for the rest of your life.

Remember: If you go out to get drunk, please take your brain with you.

CIAO! 😀

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fat girl versus mean girls
Pickles from My Mind

I Hate You ‘Coz You’re Fat

Let me start this post by enumerating why people hate fat people:

1. They’re so big that when you sit next to them in the bus, half your ass-cheeks would be hanging off the seat.

2. They’re so big that by the time they pass by in front of your TV and sit down, you’d most likely miss a 1-hour episode of Next Top Model.

3. They’re so big that… you just love to hate them.

4. And you love to hate them because… other people love hating them too.

“It’s a circle. A mean cycle.” – Paramore

What that quote means? Oh, nothing. I just like throwing lines from my favorite band’s songs randomly. LOL

Anyway, if you had ever experienced being a fat, 10-year-old girl who got spat on the face by a boy in her class, before she grew up to be a smart, talented, funny, beautiful and awesome human being (Ehem! Haha), then you’d probably asked yourself this question at least once in your life:

Fat People what's wrong with being fat

Well, I can tell you one reason why it’s wrong to be fat:

You could die very, very early. You could have a heart attack, diabetes, stroke or Cancer.

But I’m talking about real, seriously fat people here. In other words, Obese people.

Obesity (noun)

a medical condition in which excess body fat has accumulated to the extent that it may have an adverse effect on health, leading to reduced life expectancy and/or increased health problems.

real, officially and clinically FAT PERSON is someone whose Body Mass Index/BMI (Height + Weight) is waaaay beyond what’s healthy.

So that answers it, right? It’s wrong to be fat because it’s unhealthy!

But that doesn’t explain why fat people get teased, bullied or ridiculed so much as if they don’t have feelings. Like they aren’t real human beings.

Dumb-ass guy says: “Pigs don’t have feelings.”

I say: “Yeah, and so does your balls, right? –  So can I kick it?”

FATTIE VERSUS SKINNY

 Over the years, our concept of fat and skinny have changed, evolved and to be honest – it has become vague. People today, have a problem in understanding/identifying what’s really fat and what’s not.

Look at this comparative photo of a Barbie Doll from the 90’s and today’s Barbie Doll:

Barbie Doll - Now & Then

50 years ago, this is how we defined “fat” people:

fat people

50 years ago, this is how we defined “sexy” people:

marilyn moroe size 14

If you don’t recognize her, that’s Marilyn Monroe. An actress, comedienne and the most desired sex symbol during the 50’s to 60’s. Oh, and she was a size 14 (Which means she probably had a 32 -inch waistline).


Today, however, size 14 belongs to the fattie department.
Proof?

Plus size model size 14

Size 14 models who look like this, are called “PLUS-SIZED MODELS” today. And this is how we, (i-Pad sporting, Facebook-drooling people) see “sexy” today:

skinny bitch

If you don’t see women like this in magazine covers everyday, then I’m a dinosaur!

FAT GIRL VERSUS THE MEAN GIRLS

 fat girl versus mean girlsThe media is a big “influencer” of  the society. It tells us what to wear, where to go, who to idolize… And often, the media sets unrealistic standards of beauty.

Millions of girls freak out when they see even a little bit of cellulite or belly fat. And they resort to extreme measures just to keep up with the standards – diet pills, excessive exercising, self-starvation.

Could we blame the media for this? Yes, actually, we can.

Heck, the media’s been brainwashing us with billions of dollars worth of advertising lies geared to make us feel bad about ourselves for centuries!:

“Oh, your skin’s dry, buy this”.

“Your hair’s dull, buy this”.

“You must be lonely, buy this”.

“What? you hate your life? Buy this”.

The media puts so much emphasis on being thin and/or pretty, it’s no wonder why even teenage girls’ celebrity role models develop eating disorders (Demi Lovato, Ashlee Simpson, Mary-Kate Olsen, Nicole Richie – to mention a few). The media is truly a powerful thing. So powerful, it can become destructive.

How many chick flicks have you watched that doesn’t involve girls calling eachother “fat” or “ugly” or “fugly (fat+ugly)”? Don’t get me wrong, I love chick flicks because they’re funny. Hell, I even quote lines from “Mean Girls” to my friends. But sometimes I realize how twisted it seems, how these movies condition our minds to consider these vicious words as funny instead of hurtful.

meangirls - Regina George is Flawless. One time she punched me in the face

"Regina George is Flawless. One time she punched me in the face... It was AWESOME!" - Hahaha.

Because in real life, being called “fat” or “ugly” in a room full of girls IS hurtful. But often times,we don’t care if we call people names. Because we’d rather be Regina George than that girl who buys super jumbo-sized tampons. We’d rather sit with the cold, shiny, hard “Plastics” during lunch rather than be with the Asian Nerds or the Art Freaks. (Please watch “Mean Girls” if you don’t get it ;-p )

During a child’s early years of development (1 to 7 years old), they learn many things.

Including the concept of good and bad, wrong and right and yes, beautiful and ugly. But think about this for a while – what if we never knew all these?

What if we never knew what fat or skinny was? 

We’d probably see more regular-looking girls on the covers of Vogue magazine.

What if we never called eachother names or say mean things to eachother?

We’d probably have lower teen suicide rates.

 

 

J.K. Rowling, the author of Harry Potter & one of my favorite authors of all time once said this in an interview:

“Is fat really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat‘ worse than ‘vindictive‘, ‘jealous‘, ‘shallow‘, ‘vain‘, ‘boring‘ or ‘cruel‘? Not to me.” 

She even added: “Girls don’t just simply hate their bodies, we teach them to.”

Truth is, we only take in what society teaches us. We absorb what is taught us. And what we see everyday, what’s constantly being repeated to us, sooner or later, becomes a part of us.

When I found JK Rowling’s words on the internet, I suddenly realized that this particular line from “Mean Girls” actually makes sense:

“I don’t hate you ’cause you’re fat. You’re fat because I hate you.” 

WE make people fat. WE make people ugly. WE make ourselves hate eachother. It’s US. It’s all within US. We are the ones who choose what to call, how to see and how to treat people!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH BEING FAT? 

And I mean, REALLY!

I tell you what’s wrong with being fat  – NOTHING.

And I say this because I have been there. I was the fat girl. Hell, I might even still be the fat girl!

But it didn’t affect the way I was or am today. It didn’t affect my intelligence, or my ballsy-ness or my talents. It made me the woman that I am today. The sleep-all-day-and-write-a-blog-post-all-night kinda girl (It’s 7:00AM, BTW) 😉

To girls all over the world:Barbie doll and woman

Having cellulite or  belly fat doesn’t make you less of a person. Now, more than ever, I believe that. I know when you look in that mirror, there will be times all you could see are the areas that could use a little liposuction or botox.

I tell you, don’t dwell on these little imperfections. I have been there. And there’s nothing worst that you can do to yourself than to wish yourself away… To wish you were someone else. Because that’s when insecurity all begins.

Try to listen to yourself rather than believe in everything those glossy magazines tell you. Don’t make self-depreciation a habit between you and your girlfriends (“I hate my calves!”, “My pores are huge!”, “I’ve got man-shoulders!”)

Lastly, acknowledge your physical imperfections. Embrace them. It takes a whole less effort to accept yourself rather than trying to change yourself.

And the next time someone points out that your thighs are as huge as an Anaconda, instead of crying about it in the bathroom- nod a little bit, turn around and then laugh it all away 🙂

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Pickles from My Mind

So You Think You’re Cinderella

When should a girl stop believing in fairytales?

a cinderella-story

"A Cinderella Story" starring Hilary Duff and Chad Michael Murray

When I was younger, my mom read me stories about Princes, Princesses, White horses and castles before I went to sleep. I had a book as thick as an Encyclopedia that had fairytales in it (unfortunately it was “borrowed” by our neighbor – and by “borrow”, I mean stolen WITH our consent. Lol). When she read me those stories, I knew that the world was bigger.

I remember me, my big sister and cousin talking, picking out our favorite among the “Queen Bee” Disney Princesses – Snow White, Cinderella, Belle (Beauty and the Beast) and Aurora (Sleeping Beauty).

I picked Snow White. Simply because they both picked Cinderella. And I didn’t wanna jump on the bandwagon.

But everyone knows every girl wants a Cinderella story.

Unfortunately (or should it be “fortunately”?), not every girl grows out of the fairy tale phase.

Some girls grow up and date and find guys who kiss them and sweep them off their feet.

But not every guy rides a White horse and takes them to a castle. And the girl gets disappointed. See: Taylor Swift.

But is it really a guy’s fault if he displays qualities that are so un-Prince Charming? Is it really their fault if they don’t fit into a girl’s idea of a man?

Some of the common things girls complain about guys are the following:

a cinderella story - smelly guy

Ever heard of taking a bath?

1. When a guy smells like he just crawled out of a dumpster.

2. When a guy memorizes his teammates’ cellphone numbers but can’t remember his girlfriend’s last name.

3. When a guy tells his girl he’s at home when really, he’s at a strip club.

4. When a guy gets mad if HIS girl goes to a men’s strip club.

5. When a guy blows all his money in playing DOTA Poker.

(Not every girl would agree with me on this list but I’m sure they would agree with number 1 :-p )

To a girl who believes in fairytales, she would imagine her guy to be someone who would take her to ride a little boat by the river where he would quote her sweet Shakespeare or Hemingway lines.

To a girl who believes in fairytales, she would imagine her guy to throw pebbles at her window to wake her up in the middle of the night and then sing her favorite love song.

To a girl who believes in fairytales, she would want her love life to be perfect.

But that’s the thing with fairytales – they’re too perfect for reality.

Guys are humans, just like us. They screw up. They fall in love and fall out of love. And did I mention that some of them smell really bad? (Lol. Peace! 😀 )

Hell, even real Princes screw up.

Look at Prince Charles – he married a divinely beautiful woman who had a pure heart (Princess Diana) and he still managed to look away and take her for granted.

A Cinderella Story - Princess Diana, Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles

Princess Diana, Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles

But that’s because all those years he was married to Princess Diana, he was still in love with his ex, Camilla Parker Bowles. See? There’s no perfect Prince Charming out there.

So if your boyfriend has bad body odor, don’t dump him instantly. Buy him a deodorant and see what happens.

Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with hoping for a fairytale relationship but girls should not rely on it.

a cinderella story - Woman about to sneeze

The distorted, about-to-sneeze facial expression

Because the more you expect for something grand to happen, the more hurt you’re going to be when you find your expectations are not being met.

You know that feeling when you’re on the verge of sneezing but then it goes away just in time to give you that distorted about-to-sneeze expression on your face? Yeah, that’s called disappointment.

Guys don’t like it when girls expect them to be like Romeo or — for lack of a better example — Edward-Sparkly-Cullen. Just like girls hate it when guys expect them to have perfect Megan Fox-ish bodies.

Some women, however, wake up one morning and find their dreams coming true. But this doesn’t usually

a cinderella story - kate middleton and prince william

Sometimes, in the middle of our ordinary existence, life gives us a fairytale. 🙂

happen through the efforts of one guy. Actually, real-life fairytales happen through the efforts of two people who are in love.

Prince William and Kate Middleton should not have ended up together if  Kate didn’t show Prince William what he was missing by letting her go. And there would be no Royal Wedding of the Century if Prince William didn’t get his act together in time to show Kate that he was worth taking back.

But real-life fairytales aren’t about getting married in the Westminster Abbey and kissing on the balcony of the Buckingham Palace (although we wish we could!), it’s about going to the extremes, beating all odds and going against the tide to be with that one person who makes you feel like you’re the lead character from a romantic movie, even though you’re only standing in your living room with your fluffy slippers on.

I, personally, dream of having a love story fit for Disney books. But after dreaming, I wake up, face life and accept that I’m no Disney Princess. I’m not Cinderella.

And I understand that when I fall in love, I should not compare our relationship to a fairytale book. I get that this is reality – not everything is perfect.

But I know that in the middle of my ordinary existence, there will be times where life gives me short and swift moments similar to a fairytale. But that’s all there is – short moments. And when these moments happen, I should cherish every second.

And I have faith that someday, I’d be lucky enough to meet a normal, 100% ordinary human guy who would make me feel extraordinary, fairytale-like feelings.

And just hope that he doesn’t sparkle 😉

a cinderella story Edward Cullen Sparkle

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virgins talking dirty
Pickles from My Mind

When Virgins Talk Dirty

NOTE: The following post contains explicit words. Read with an open mind. CHAR.

virgins talking dirty

There are two kinds of virgins:

1. Those who are afraid of sex.

2. Those who are ready for sex but are waiting/ haven’t found the right person to do it with yet.

unicorn woman

Warning: If you see this unicorn woman, call animal control. Oh, and also, submit yourself to a psych ward. 🙂

The world is really changing. People rush into many things, including sex. And although perverts/nymphos some people might define VIRGINS as “Mythical, non-existent creatures”, they DO still exist. Yes – they do exist. And no – they are NOT unicorns.

Why are virgins, virgins?  Some people find out you’re a virgin and they think you’re some weird girl who sits at the back of the class, eating her hair. While others find out you’re a virgin and they automatically assume you live in the convent with the nuns. Although, many boys, when they find out you’re a virgin, they pretend they are, too and propose you do it together for the first time.

A brilliant friend of mine once said that virginity is subjective.

How does one really measure/ define/ tell if a person is a virgin?

virgin /vir·gin/ (vir´jin)

1. A person who has not had sexual intercourse.

2. A laboratory animal that has been kept free from sexual intercourse.

3. A person who has not had vaginal intercourse (for women)

4. A woman whose hymen is still intact.

So, virgins are not mythical creatures, but are laboratory animals?! Gee. Thanks, Medical-Dictionary.com.

In Greek, it’s called “parthenos”. So when you and your friends talk about your V-card in front of your parents, try using that word.

“Hey, parthenos. What happened to you last night?”

“Oh, nothing to be curious about. I still live in parthenoville.

“Seriously? When you gonna lose your parthenobility, weirdo?”

HAHA. Corny. 🙂

Anyways, when I was in High School, our teacher told us that a woman only loses her virginity when she loses her hymen.

The hymen is a membrane that surrounds or partially covers the external vaginal opening. It’s the door to the castle. The lid on the cup. The fairy that guards the entrance to the enchanted cave.

While our teacher told us that there are many ways a woman could lose her hymen besides sex (like doing physically strenuous activities), I also read that not all women possess a hymen. Just like not all people were born with two arms and legs.

If the possession of the big H is a way to tell if a woman is a virgin, then not all women were born virgins!

I found another definition of the word:

Virgin – A sexually naive person.

So is a person who has not had sexual intercourse but is mentally knowledgeable about sex, un-virgin?  Then maybe my brilliant friend is right – virginity IS subjective. Is virginity only in the mind? If a person watches porn, does that de-virginize him/ her?

When virgins talk dirty, when their jokes are greener than a virgin forest, does that disqualify him/ her in the virgin parade?

I know a lot of people who wish they never had sex so young. They wished they waited for the right person – maybe even marriage – to have sex. But how do you know if a person IS the right person?

Is it right to keep waiting? When does the waiting end? Life would have been

Will You Still Love Me in the Morning - Click - Adam Sandler and Kate Beckinsale

"Will you still love me in the morning?" "Forever and ever, Babe." - CLICK (starring Adam Sandler and Kate Beckinsale)

easier if there was always some sure sign that you’re with the right person. That it’s okay to lose your virginity to him/ her because he/ she will stick around in the morning. And the morning after that. And the morning after that.

My friend’s teacher in the University of the Philippines told them something really funny. He said: “class… I have one advice to you. NEVER die a virgin.”

His point was – sex is a pleasure like no other and that every person must experience it at least once in their life.

But what if after the pleasure, you get attached to someone unattached to you?

All I can say is, sex is a complicated topic. A lot of people would describe it contradictingly. Like:

Sex is good and bad.

Sex is heaven and hell.

Sex takes you really high but you come down really low afterwards.

Sex is E=MC2

Sex is Pofinasoegnasdghweoi123u40eut9e8rgpe9hgwegubhshosjgnisdvn.

It’s THAT complicated.

It ain’t good. It ain’t bad. It’s a gray matter.

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